Wednesday, September 26, 2012

a message for the mama of a little one


Mama, I remember.

I wish I had thought to capture some photos. Picture memories of daily life at the time. Walking endlessly, nursing endlessly, crying and crying and pure and utter exhaustion.

Mama, I remember like it was yesterday.  Not knowing how on earth I was to get it all done. Begging Tim, please, please, please can't you stay home from work another day.  I just can't do it. One week at home, and one week working from home was a lot compared to some, I realize now.  But my confidence was buried in a pit somewhere, and no one could convince me that it would be okay.
Mothering two came as a huge shock.  I entered motherhood the first time with pure joy. I do remember walking Charlotte through the house in the middle of the night, living room to kitchen door to bedroom, watching Tim sleep wishing, wishing I could be too.  But I had become a mama, and it had been a longing of my heart for a long time.

Exhaustion was pure.  It was intense with two.  Two babies, two years and newborn. So many needs, only one me.    

Mama, please know that it is going to get better. It is going to be okay. Surround yourself with loving support. Accept meals, accept help. You are in a season. It will be okay. Discover what brings you peace and joy and DO those things. Even if it's every once in a while, it will make a difference. 



One day, you will turn around and your children will be playing happily for chunks of time at a time and it will take your breath away. You will realize that you have space and a second to breathe and relax. Please don't feel guilty about this! Feed your mama soul during these times. 

Mama, know that you are not alone. Reach out and lug your newborn to a coffee shop with a friend and spill your heart. Saying that it is hard out loud, like nothing you ever imagined, it will help.


Give yourself grace, mama. It's a hard season, that season of newborn to one year. And even beyond. 

Much love,
Pamela

(photo credit - Shanie Stozek)

5 comments:

  1. Thank you for sharing this Pamela. This was me too and it does get better. Slowly, and surely God stretches us and makes us the mother he intended us to be.

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  2. Mama, I remember.
    K

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  3. Beautifully written, and oh, so needed. Thank you, Pamela.

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  4. This is beautiful Pamela. You are amazing.

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  5. This is beautiful Pamela. I just tweeted it. I remember this so much. The overwhelm and then eventually the shock that my children could actually play independent from me for minutes and then hours at a time.

    I do absolutely agree that the baby years are very hard and it gets much better.

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